Why is an attraction to big women considered a fetish instead of a preference, such as a woman preferring tall men to short or someone preferring blondes to brunettes? And why do some guys have no problem saying their attraction to big women is a fetish?
-Lyric
Because they're idiots? Fat is marginalized by society as a negative, so maybe in that sense it counts as taboo but it's certainly a preference. I would go as far as to claim it's almost a different orientation in itself, which may anger some of my queer friends, but the physical disparities between say, a 400 lb. person and a 140 lb. partner and what an admirer seeks from either is just that rhetorically different. If anyone grumbles, I'd like a casual fan of 400 lb. partners to pipe up. There are fat-related fetishes, and plenty of ways to fetishize body parts themselves, but just dating and fucking fatties in itself is certainly a preference. I split the line of fetish and preference socially; preferences you tell your friends and colleagues openly and nonchalantly, as you would discuss a predilection for blondes. Fetishes you only tell your closest confidantes, if that. And in that regard, plenty of FAs fetishize it themselves by hiding it.
As someone who is queer and enjoys the fatties, I do think my fat attractions and desires are very similar to my attractions and desires for people of the same gender (or genderqueers). For some reason, this connection pisses a lot of people off. It wasn't that long ago that "homosexuality" was a fetish and/or a pathology caused by a cold aloof mother and an absent father, so I don't think 'fetish' holds water as a legitimate way to define most aspects of fat sexuality. It would be more useful to use the idea of 'taboo' to discuss the more 'fetish-like' behaviors associated with fat attraction.
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